Mental and physical health

“You have three relationships; the first is with your physical abode, the body; the second is with the divine source of everything; and the third is with those who share this life with you.”

-       Marcus Aurelius

The job transition game is exhausting and challenging on many levels.   The first and foremost is emotional.   The stresses of reaching out to people, the excitement about a new opportunity, the disappointment of a denial, the interactions with your immediate support network, and the list goes on.  People are generally supportive, but emotional gymnastics are real, and the stakes of your efforts are greater than most things.  Providing for your family (or yourself) is one of those basic instincts and when we can’t do that, it is draining and eats away at our self-respect and how we have defined ourselves. 

Mentally you will be taxed as well. Trying to always ‘be on’ while around others whom you are interacting with, and keeping various opportunities, you are pursuing straight.  Spending time and energy writing and re-writing job applications and resumes.  Working to be mentally alert in every conversation  and try to say the right thing at the right time.  Trying to guess correctly about every person’s ‘angle’ on a question or comment.  It is mentally and emotionally very tiring.

Physically you will find challenges as well.  Although much of the work is from a desk, phone, computer, etc…there is a real impact on your body.  Stress is almost constant and at levels higher than usual.  This affects blood pressure, sleep, nerves, digestion, etc.  Sleep will likely be elusive, as your thoughts refuse to quiet down at night. The brain doesn’t function at top levels if the body isn’t taken care of.

-   Routine   -

All of these things are related, and you need to devote time and energy on taking care of them all.  This is why I found the quote from Marcus Aurelius so interesting.  “You have three relationships; the first is with your physical abode, the body; the second is with the divine source of everything; and the third is with those who share this life with you.”  Marcus wrote these words between 150-180 AD…even roughly 2000 years ago the knowledge of self-care was known.

Establishing a routine and spending real time taking care of your physical body, your mental state and your emotional well-being are some of the most important things you can do during your job transition. 

Tips on working through this:

• Physical Well Being:

  • You can get sucked into the computer and phone with the best of intentions to move the needle on the search.  However, this will probably be a marathon and not a sprint.  Plan to pace yourself.  Spend time taking care of your body so you are at your best when engaging with an opportunity.

  • Find time for physical exercise to help blow off steam, lower blood pressure and work on a positive self-image.

  • Eat healthy.  You may binge a bit at first but take this opportunity to adjust the intake into your body to be in a healthy place.

• Mental Well Being:

  • Establish a schedule and work to keep to it.   During a job transition there aren’t office hours, but it will help to put some structure in your life.  It will also help the people around you.  When are you working on the job search.  When are you not.

  • Take time for yourself to do other things than look for the next job.  Chores around the house, join a league of some sort, finish a project you had put off, cook something, start a garden, engage your brain in another way, and so on.  It is helpful to mix-things-up a bit intellectually and then allow you to come back to your job search efforts refreshed. 

  • Work on finding some quiet time to center yourself.  Take a walk, do some meditation, listen to some music or explore breathing exercises.   You have a lot of $h!t to process.  Make sure you have time and space to do this.

• Emotional Well Being:

  • Find ways to get emotional support.  This can be family or friends…find people you can confide in.  People that will also talk about other things to help you get your mind off the current job search efforts.  We need to have people that ‘get us’, that can help distract us, and that can help us talk through the situation and process things.

  • Put special efforts into your partner (if you have one).  This situation will be just as confusing and challenging for them as it will be for you.  The longer it goes on the more the stress may build.  Be open and honest with each other.  Touch base on a regular cadence with updates, current opportunities, challenges, possible trade-offs, etc.

In the movie the ‘Shining’ there is a famous quote from an old proverb, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.”   If you ever sit and watch the movie, you will understand that when Jack is a dull boy things go badly…to put it mildly.  Spending too much time at the grinding stone, eventually creates bad tools.  Work hard, but also find time to play hard, breathe and keep yourself centered. You owe it to yourself and the friends and family around you to heed the advice from Marcus Aurelius.