Keep a Gratitude Journal

“In the end, though, maybe we must all give up trying to pay back the people in this world who sustain our lives. In the end, maybe it's wiser to surrender before the miraculous scope of human generosity and to just keep saying thank you, forever and sincerely, for as long as we have voices.”

― Elizabeth Gilbert;  Eat, Pray, Love

Make it a point to keep a gratitude Journal. I don’t remember exactly where this suggestion came from, but it is a good one.  It is easy to get worn down, frustrated and disappointed during the job transition.  In the midst of your angst and effort to work for that next role…it is healthy and important to stop and acknowledge the good things that are going on in your life.  John F. Kennedy said it well, “We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives.”

My suggestion is that this is more than a 60 second timeout to mentally think through some names.  I started a journal…yes a written journal, and would record the name of the person and what I was thankful for that they did for me.  Writing it down forced me to slow down, name the reason I was thankful and then to briefly relive the ‘goodness’ that I experienced.  You can write this in a notebook, a true journal, a Word document on the computer, on notecards, etc.

Here are a few examples of things you might name:

-       Met me for a drink and listened

-       Answered my phone call or e-mail

-       Helped me read through and edit my resume

-       Suggested someone I should network with

-       Sent me a job posting

-       One of your children spent time with you

-       A job transition group that has welcomed you

-       Received a supportive note from a friend

-       Someone commented positively on your Linked In post

-       Discussed with another person about their experience in this situation

-       Recruiter that engaged with you

-       A past co-worker reached out

-       Agreed to be a reference

-       Had lunch with me

-       Etc.

Emotions are running high during this time and it is easy to go to dark places.  While you are subconsciously aware of people’s efforts to help, the act of taking time to write it down and acknowledge how they supported you can be really uplifting.  You are not alone.  People want good things for you and it is important not to miss their well-intentioned actions in the pressure of the situation.

What you do from this point is up to you.  You might send them a thank you e-mail or a ‘snail mail’ written note.  You also might just nod in their direction, say a quick prayer of thanks and promise to buy them lunch after you land your next job.  The fun part will be one week or one month or a few months later and reading back over the things that people have done to help you. 

The act of writing these gratitude’s down and forcing myself to slow down and focus on someone else was inexpensive therapy.  It is too easy to get wrapped up in the Eeyore (from Winnie the Pooh) self-pity spiral of ‘woe is me’.  Acknowledging what others are doing for you and turning your attitude outward was a breath of fresh air.  I have a friend who when asked ‘How are you doing?’, would respond…’woke up breathing and things got better from there.’  Life maybe tough at the moment, but there are good things going on around you.  Life is too short to not appreciate the good things.